The Art of Toweling Off

At some point you will be standing in public place, naked and wet with a towel in your hand. What you do with that towel will speak volumes to your character, let me help you be the most confident version of you.

You are standing there, water running down your body all, your first instinct is to wrap the towel around yourself to do the double duty of covering your shame and drying you off. 

Don’t.

Wrap the towel around your head. As your towel absorbs the excess water in your hair organize your clothes and the various toiletries. 

Do not put on the clothes.

After you are organized remove the towel from your head and rub yourself down. After a quick once over, you will want begin a more focused drying process. 

Your junk needs extra attention, you wouldn’t want people to think you are uncomfortable with your genitals. As you vigorously rub your business dry make eye contact with the other people in the room, if they resist use the mirror to your advantage.

Once your nethers are finished make a phone call. I’m sure you have a call you’ve been putting off, nows the time to end your procrastination. While you are blathering on, caress your bosom dry. You want to give your boobies (yes, I said boobies) the love that they deserve.

By this point you should be feeling powerful. You own the room. As your final display of your command place one leg on the counter in front of the mirror and lotion up.

Your skin will be as smooth as your path through life.

 

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