Being Sick, the Adult Way

I’ve tried to help you keep from getting sick, but it’s going to happen even if you listen to me. When you are sick you need to take steps to letting people know that you are under the weather and then take steps toward getting better. Below are some of the steps adults take when they are sick.

Whine

Seriously, sighing and whining is the best way to alert others to being unwell. Whining is an art. One can’t describe to you because I am sick and describing whining is too hard right now. Understand? *Sigh*

Slow down

As an adult you have responsibilities, going to the grocery store is a fine example of one of these responsibilities. So anyway, you have crap to do so you’ll do it, just do it at half speed. So you have to buy groceries. This is the time to forget your list, wandering will sooth you. The other shoppers will start to steer clear of you after they’ve seen you in the same aisle for the seventh time.

Where was I going with this?

Nap 

If you’re tired you should give in. Maybe you’re sitting in your car after you’ve spent three hours buying milk and cookies, go ahead and nod off. You’re sitting in a chair in the Patient First ready to wait for the Sunday rush to end, shut your eyes. If you are the idiot who took your sick to work, you need to rest to get better, go ahead lay your head down.

I have found that four or five naps do the trick.

Tough it out

You could probably take something to feel a little better. But are you really so sick that you need pills? Your body knows what it’s doing, let it do it’s thing. It’s not like being sick kills people, what is this 1843?

Eat crap food

Your body needs extra unhealthy to get healthy. Ice cream will cure a sore throat. Soda will clear your sinuses. Tummy sick? Probably try a bag of sugar and a pot of coffee, or a can of mixed nuts…

So yeah, sick sucks, make everyone feel as bad as you do.

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