We all use codes to keep our dirty little secrets secret. Your money, your contacts, your pictures they’re all hidden behind a series of four numbers. 

It seems trivial to you but I’ve seen people’s life savings run into the ether because they couldn’t protect that arbitrary series of digits. Revenge porn sites and Nigerian princes take advantage of our lack of creativity when it comes to numbers. You need to protect yourself, directions follow below.

Make it random

When creating a PIN you need a random set of four numbers, 0 through 9 work well. Avoid using your birthday, phone number, and the last four digits of your social security number. 

No one will ever guess that you went with 1234 or 5678, personally I’d go with 3692.

You know what nobody has ever done before? Made a pattern on a keypad! Do that!! Touch the corners,  form a square or a triangle or a kite, kites are like the most secret of keypad shapes. 

If you want to guess what someone else’s PIN is, start with Christmas.

Don’t write it down

Having a concrete record of your codes is a great way to get them stolen. Instead find someone to share them with that person. 

Be careful though you have to choose the correct human vault, perhaps not a friend, but defiantly someone you trust. Think repetitive Tinder hook up or the lady at the tollbooth on the way to the office. Or Jesus, because your priest is too old to keep it straight.

Use the same code

Your phone is protected by a code but just in case you keep your dick pics and proof of all the things you’ve stuck your photogenic member in under electronic lock and key, no reason to complicate things, use the same code.

Remember: if it’s good enough for your penis, it’s good enough for your front door.