Protecting Yourself from the Zombies

It will happen. 

You’ll be at work, minding your own business and you’ll hear a crash. Something has entered through the exterior door and is struggling against the interior door. It’s gruesome, bleeding, crazed, disheveled, and coming for you. 

So what do you do?

  1. Lock the door. It’s your best bet to keep this monster of a being from entering your safe space. He’ll continue to struggle against the glass but it’s bulket resistant so it’s probably safe.
  2. Take a picture. Video also works, it’s really up to you, just get visual evidence. No one will believe you if you don’t immediately post it on all of the social medias. 
  3. Argue with your coworkers who has the wittiest caption. It’s you, by the way. Don’t deny it. All six of your Twitter followers said so.
  4. Call the authorities. The police have guns and tasers and protective gloves for these types of situations. Let them handle it. 
  5. Call the media. This is your 15 minutes! Don’t let it pass by. Maybe the Today Show or Oprah will take notice and you’ll get to be a famous zombie expert on all of the biggest talk shows on tv. 
  6. Check to make sure this zombie isn’t just an old person. They are just as clumsy, you know. 
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