Knowing When to Buy a House

Because of my professional job as a banker I am constantly bombarded with people taking that big leap into homeownership simply because it’s the next step.

While I’m all for conforming to what society said was the appropriate behavior for someone of a certain age in the 1950s, you may not be. Below is a list of things you should consider before you sink your 401k into a fixer-upper. 
Do you know how to mow grass?

Most houses come with some grass, perhaps just a strip between the sidewalk and driveway, but it’s grass and it grows so it will need mowed. If you don’t know how to mow, or clean gutters, reattached a doorknob, replace caulking, maybe consider a top floor condo or an apartment. Condos and apartments both come with people to do a lot of this stuff for you.

Do you know where to buy appliances?

I’m sure you’ve seen that little shop with the barred windows selling junkyard refurbished large appliances. Don’t go there. Also if you haven’t done some research and set a budget don’t go to anywhere, because I will have taken a third job at Lowe’s or Sears or where ever you are going and I’m going to up-sell the shit out of you. 

You’re welcome.

Are you okay with children on your lawn?

If these children I mention are yours you should be okay with it.

 If these kids are not your offspring and you are not paying them $0.25 to rake nine acres of leaves into the street for pick up then you should not be okay with it. 

Are you okay with raccoons making love outside your windows?

Early Morning Raccoon Romance
 

You thought I was kidding. 

Fun fact: they are quieter than my neighbors.

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