When to Smile

Smiling makes people happy. The physical act of smiling makes the smiler happy (science!) and smiles, like yawns, are contagious. 

But sometimes your face just doesn’t smile. This is occasionally called resting bitch face (which amuses me because it perfectly sums up what my sister looks like throwing shade and infuriates me because there has to be more than two modes for faces, the dichotomy is just dumb).

It’s hard to know when we should be smiling and when it’s acceptable to allow your expression to be neutral, fear not, a list, though incomplete, of smile time requirements can be found below.

Answering the phone at work

It’s a total sales cliché, but clichés exist for a reason. When you answer the phone with a smile the client is confused about how much you don’t want to be talking to them. You sound so much nicer than you are, and they’ll tell someone important about the pleasant experience they had with you.

Maybe your pleasantness will be rewarded with more responsibilities and less pay, and that is the American dream. (Which is another reason to smile!)

Talking to strange dogs in the park

Dogs (excluding mine) are particularly adept at reading human emotions. Because of years of selective breeding smiling at them makes us more approachable and if they are not scared then they are less likely to eat your face off. 
This is not to say that strange dogs want to eat your face off, but you know, sometimes they do. 

Also smiling makes them smile,which is my favorite so it should be yours too. 

Meeting a potential suitor 

I’m sure that there is a study to back up this idea, but it’s so obvious I’m not even going to look for it. 

If you want someone to like you, cue them to do just that. Smile. Smile some more. Date this person and maybe they will be a reason to smile all on their own.

After a dental cleaning

You just paid good money (because who has dental insurance these days?) to get those bad boys polished. Flaunt those motherfuckers.

When a middle-aged man tells you too

Middle-aged men need us to brighten their day with our smiles. They have experienced more than we have and know that no matter how far you’ve hikes, how hard you are thinking, or how violent the murder you are silently committing within the safety of your mind it isn’t enough not to smile for them. They deserve it.

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