It’s Wednesday and on Wednesday you go out for a midweek bitch-fest with the few people you can stand from the office.
Huzzah!
But what if you slip up, you let the cat out of the bag, fun will be had without the office others, and they know it? Fear not. You are truly a dunce, but the moment may still be salvaged. Try a trick or two from the list below.
- Lie. They ask if you are going to happy hour, you say no. Nope. Nopity, nope, nope. Maybe mention what a good idea that would be, let them start planning for a happy hour next month.
- Lie about who is joining you. They ask if you’re going to happy hour and you don’t even look up, just mention friends. No one from work wants to hang out with your friends, so it’s. Pretty safe bet.
- Lie by using people’s legal names. They ask if you are headed to happy hour and you look them dead and the eye and say, “yes, I am meeting Nancy and James.” The agreeable coworkers maybe named this but it is not what they are called. You get to drink.
- Lie by driving away. They ask if you’re meeting the other for a drink and you deny it, explain that your parents need your help, your dog needs walked, and the fridge needs bleaching. Then get in your car and drive around the block twice before parking in a different spot.
- Lie by inviting them. They ask if you and the boss are getting dinner, say “yeah, sure, come with.” Then give them an incorrect time and an incorrect place. Then 45 minutes after the scheduled meet time, flake.
- Lie by telling the truth. They’ll ask you about your plans for happy hour and you’ll say, “All of us are going to get drunk and talk about how we can’t stand you.” Then smile and wink.
Enjoy your drinks. You deserve them.