One of the greatest pleasures of adulthood is having the autonomy to spend your money as you see fit. This past years’s isolation led many people, including myself, to examine where the line of their wants and needs converges, and then buy the shit out of everything they could possibly want. Peloton had a banner … Continue reading The Healing Power of Touch
health
Big Girls Don’t Cry
I'm jump starting 2019 by taking a month or two to focus on eating the way my body needs me to. It's a diet, and also not a diet, I don't count calories, I don't worry about serving sizes, I don't obsessively fast, though I have been known to occasionally fast out of sheer laziness. … Continue reading Big Girls Don’t Cry
How to Handle a Medical Emergency in Heels
I haven't been writing lately, instead I have been sitting on my balcony staring at the sky in the evenings wondering how I survived the last year, it was mostly shit, and after sudden move things are ok, mostly (I did accidentally open porn on my phone at my new job that one time, and … Continue reading How to Handle a Medical Emergency in Heels
Tissues Up Your Sleeve and other Grown-up Things That Prevent Illness
It's flu season, in case you had your head in the sand, and Australia's early flu season predicted that the US was going to take a sucker punch. Then the weather got a bit excitable, waffling between -7 and 73 degrees Fahrenheit. This one-two punch has old people trapped in their homes, too scared to … Continue reading Tissues Up Your Sleeve and other Grown-up Things That Prevent Illness
A Visiting the Doctor: A Guide to Healthy Junk
This post is dedicated to Jay, who absolutely loves when I write about things he cannot relate to or doesn't understand. This year, the year I turn 30 and become a grown up for good, I got real life health insurance and decided to take the reigns on my physical wellness. This has somehow turned … Continue reading A Visiting the Doctor: A Guide to Healthy Junk
Tamping Excess Vaginal Cash Flow
If you have, or want to have, or want to use someone else's vagina you know they can be very expensive. And while most of us are scraping our pennies to buy the basic $11 box of generic tampons* and running to Victoria Secret with coupons in had for ill fitting, sexy, free panties, there are … Continue reading Tamping Excess Vaginal Cash Flow
I Can’t Eat That: A Guide to Dieting
To all who have suffered* through the last month with me: I am sorry. For those of you who didn't, know that cutting out sugar, dairy, grains, starches, and legumes makes everyone around you miserable. I am not alone when it comes to dieting. Millions of you are out there lamenting all the foods you … Continue reading I Can’t Eat That: A Guide to Dieting
Food Snobbery on a Budget
I am known for my upturned nose at the foods of the people. I will not apologize for this. Store bought cookies are crap, Hershey's chocolate tastes like morning breath, canned and frozen vegetables have their place and it's not in my kitchen. Cheeses are supposed to be small batched and hummus has a very … Continue reading Food Snobbery on a Budget
How to Decide if You Need a Doctor
If you are anything like me deciding whether or not you need to see a doctor is harder than dropping half your annual salary on a vacation or changing your career path in the middle of being super successful. I hate visiting the doctor despite working for one on a regular basis. I hate visiting … Continue reading How to Decide if You Need a Doctor
New Year Resolution: Your Guide to Success
Happy New Year! Now onto New year, New you talk! This year, skip the bullshit. You aren't going to lose any weight, you aren't going to exercise more frequently, and you aren't going to be a generally better person, I know this because you haven't done it any other year. This year take the whole New … Continue reading New Year Resolution: Your Guide to Success
The Wiseass Life Coach 